Word on the street (and the Battersea newsletter) is that Roxanne once escaped her run and made a beeline for the staff kitchen. She didn’t steal food—oh no, that’s too simple. She organized the treat jar by size and then returned to her bed, wagging her tail with smug satisfaction. The staff nicknamed her “The Manager.”
This means adopters should invest in childproof locks, a sturdy crate, and maybe a small whiteboard for her to write her daily demands. “More belly rubs. Less broccoli. Corgis are not real dogs.”
Who Should Adopt Roxanne?
If you’re a couch potato, look away now. Roxanne needs an active human—someone who hikes, runs, or at least power-walks to the fridge. She’s perfect for a fitness enthusiast, a dog trainer, or a person who enjoys being outsmarted on a daily basis. Bonus points if you own a flock of sheep; she’s got a strong herding instinct and will try to round up your children, cats, and that one slow-moving Roomba.
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But here’s the heart of it: Roxanne is loyal to a fault. Once she bonds with you, she’ll follow you from room to room like a furry shadow. You’ll never pee alone again. That’s the deal.
